Monk

Monk's daily "I think its a bunch of bullshit myself, but I do know one thing I am going to get my kicks in before the whole shithouse goes up in flames" horoscope

Your Birthday Today: October 14th, eh? Doesn't have much of a ring to it, does it? Dull, dull, dull. If I were born on October 14th I would've gone back in and waited 'til the 28th. I like the sound of October 28th.

Aries: No, it doesn't surprise me that he would say that.
Taurus: Can't you just let someone else talk for a minute?
Gemini: That greeting card isn't as funny as you think it is.
Cancer: No, it's a left here, then right at the light. Right, I said!
Leo: Damn, girl! Yo shit be up in my face!
Virgo: That's right, I saw you checking out your own tits...
Libra: You and that lion at the zoo did not "connect". He's just hungry.
Scorpio: You got to have a mother for me so move your big ass round this way so I can work on that zipper baby...
Sagittarius: Jesus was a Capricorn.
Capricorn: You are too as think as I drunk you am.
Aquarius: TRUCK!
Pisces: It's Chicken OF the sea.

Posted by monk at 14.10.03 11:16