Just while it's on my mind: of the few friends I have, the majority are female. If I start going into the reasons for this, we'll be here all night. I'm perfectly happy with this state of affairs, but there seems sometimes to be a tiresome recurring theme to my conversations with my female friends- namely, the creeps they've dated.
Part of my complaint is that I always sense an implied complicity- and sometimes an explicitly stated "why didn't you stop me?". Well, for starters, and not to come off condescending because the good lord knows i've made my mistakes too, but because you're a big girl now. Also because we both know that when you're either enthralled with someone or just plain horny, my saying "you know that guy's a creep, don't you?" will be treated with the same gravity as a mosquito buzzing around your ear. So don't blame me, but don't blame yourself either- one reason I can recognize creepiness that eludes you is that you're a girl and i'm a boy and an occasional creep- so i can smell the creepiness in other boys where you smell only a tad too much CK One. However, there is one infallible rule you can take to the bank in your ongoing effort to avoid another debacle. It may sound too simple, it may sound like a generalization, you may find yourself tempted on occasion to ignore this bit of free advice. I implore you- don't. This one is guaran-fucking-teed a hundred percent. Are you ready? Here it is:
If a guy wears a vest with no shirt, he is a creep.
Don't ask me to explain why, just please believe me. If a guy doesn't know that a vest is an outer garment, can you really expect him to know, y'know, things like, well, you know.
You're welcome.