I know several people who compulsively make lists. My theory is that it's a substitute for actually doing anything. Haven't they ever heard of alcohol? Anyway, I make lists too- but mine aren't really things to do. They're just lists of phrases, images, slogans for nonexistent companies and products (and some real ones)- I guess the best way for me to describe it is verbal nose-picking. I kind of reach in, stare at my finger, and wipe it on the page.
Well, I'm in a kind of foul mood today and don't really feel like talking, so you're stuck reading a randomly selected list from an old notebook:
the smell of old mop
a trick knee
a blind arithmetist
a sexy coupon
a plaster divorce kit
a trojan lobster
the man who all of the sudden one day couldn't see pants
a broken sink
pineapple flambe'
frottage
the frenetic cleaning of garbage cans
the words "SMILING DEATH" appearing in your bowl of Alpha-Bits cereal
a spectral mongoose named Jef. one "f".
the turd that would not flush
some lions feasting on a felled wildebeest- among them, a chihuahua, doing the same.
its tail wagging like crazy.
some stupid with a flare gun burnt the place to the ground
smoke on the water
newspaper clippings of the gods
rich corinthian leather
the horror
the horror
that was complete and unexpurgated, unfortunately.
another list the next time I have nothing to say.