The Monk Bought Lunch

I think I'm Under Duress for this Party

Aunty Geist is right, I was forced into this, and I don't like being forced into anything. I maintain my girlish figure by sticking to my workout regimen: High Impact Kicking and Screaming.

And she ought to know better. Has she forgotten my reactions when she'd brandish a forkful of something under my nose while screeching "Try this! Try this!"? If so, allow me to refresh her memory:
"IF YOU DON'T GET THAT GODDAMN FORK OUT OF MY FACE YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO EAT THROUGH A STRAW THE REST OF YOUR LIFE! Set the fork down on the plate where I can approach at will- MY will- and taste this food when I get good and ready".
Of course, Aunty knows that I am rarely good, seldom ready, and never simultaneously both, and if we all waited for such to occur I would never do anything. Which is why she is now waving the blogfork under my Luddite nose and e-screeching "Try This!".
So, okay. But I'm not going to like it.

note: re: that thing about having to eat through a straw- any threat of physical violence that I've ever uttered has been entirely devoid of actual intent to follow through. my mouth likes to write checks my ass can't endorse (even "for deposit only"). I bet it's great to beat the crap out of someone once in awhile, but I'm not likely to ever find out, as I am built like a prepubescent girl gymnast.
But without the muscle tone.

Posted by monk at 15.08.03 10:40