Antigeist

57 Channels and nothing's on; my ass.

As a graduation present to himself and reward for a job well done*, G got us hooked up to the cable Tee-Vee. The digital ba-zillion channels caaaaaaaable TV. In the living room and the bedroom.

Screwed, are we.

To put it in perspective, our having cable is equivalent to a recovering alcoholic getting a job as a taster in a booze factory -- a trigger the susceptible should avoid. Which we have, for years, using the ungodly expense of cable as an excuse to abstain (while spending about eighty dollars a month renting movies and cable TV series). But it was never really about the money. It was always about the succumbing. The booty all sunk down in the couch still in your pajamas at dusk who wants to go to some shitty art show with your friends when there's a Slayer VH-1 Behind The Music re-run atrophy into nothingness. We knew the second the cable-guy handed over the remote it would sound the death knell for the last remaining hobbies we enjoy and our already laughable excuse for a social life.

Which it has already. But man, is it worth it. Have you seen the cable TV? I know the novelty will wear off and we'll socialize again, go back to sleeping at night, but until then it's all eye-bags, ordering in, and clicker-hand carpel tunnel around here. Seriously, have you seen the cable TV? There's like a million channels. I'll throw dinner parties when I'm old and sleep when I'm dead.

*a lie, a transparent justification, we just wanted the damn cable. But the job well done part is true: top ten of his class, Magna Cum Laude, a heap of awards (including one cash prize) for excellence... the list goes on kids, my man has mad smarts to spare.

Posted by Antigeist at June 27, 2004 10:27 AM