Oh, right...

...like you don't ever vanity search. I bet you've never screened a phone call either. And I suppose you have every intention of ringing that drunken one-off someday as well, you know, just to catch up. Uh-Oh, what's this? A library book that was NEVER RETURNED? Oh, I see, you bought it at The Strand.

Yeah, you're right. A vanity search would be so like, beneath you.